Demystifying Tarot cards

Confession: I own a few decks of tarot cards. Clarification: I don’t use them for fortune-telling.

Everyone has intuition and everyone uses it. Some people are just a lot more aware of their intuition than others. There are numerous different tools to help you tune into your intuition. The Tarot is one of those tools.

When I mention to people that I like doing tarot readings for myself and for my friends, they think it’s a joke and ask, “You believe in that stuff?”

As a matter of fact, yes! I believe in tuning into your intuition, that “gut feeling” about things. I believe in seeking clarity. I believe in relaxing and quieting your mind, and then concentrating on the situation you are wanting to improve. What is so mystical about that?

For me, it works hand-in-hand with prayer and meditation.

You have to use your intuition in order to read tarot cards for yourself or others. Each card may have a standard meaning or message, but really, each reading is up for your own interpretation. We all view the same world through different perspectives; the tarot is no different. Every sign or message we are presented with, we each interpret in our own way. Even if you don’t “believe” that there is any substance to tarot readings, trust me, you will still get the message that you were meant to hear. Just trust your intuition.

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Don’t mind my “long-lasting” gel manicure…can you “feel” or “think” with your hands?

I Wonder

What does it feel like

To be in your shoes?

I wonder

As I sit here sulking

Soaking in the madness of my life

I wonder if it’s better where you are

Do you, too, look up at the stars

And wonder if they’re brighter

To someone worlds apart?

Dear Honey

I set my bowl of honey
With hopes you’d fly in
I poured it all on me
Let it cover my skin
I prayed for your loving
I prayed for your sin
I hoped you would touch me
And that we’d begin

I waited and waited
Let it drip to the floor
I pictured you craving
Consumption and more
I felt what it’d feel like
If you came through that door
Got lost in my thoughts
‘Til all the honey was poured

Like a beached whale…

…but not really.

The year is coming to a close. It’s been real interesting. I became a mother and had an introductory crash course on what life has really been like for my own mother all these years. Motherhood isn’t easy. You miss out on a lot of sleep and self-care. But it’s also very rewarding. The smiles, the cuddles, the coos, the giggles. The fact that when baby is cranky all he wants is mommy. 😇

I have no regrets. I love my baby. Sometimes, I may feel like I can’t get as much done as I would like to. But it doesn’t matter. As long as I take care of the things I need to do in order to care for my little one. He’s the center of my world. And nothing matters more than his well-being, health and happiness. 👩‍👦

 

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New Smyrna Beach, Florida. October 2019

Untitled Update

I don’t have much to complain about right now. Even though I may not be in an “ideal” situation, I’m thoroughly enjoying the process of becoming a better me. And quite honestly, I feel like the Universe has been conspiring in my favor lately.

The way to be happy…is to focus on the things that make you happy.

It really is that simple.

Playing the Field

And then there was “him.” Oh how many times I wish this weren’t a thing, but there it is. Deeper than the undiscovered parts of the seas. This is the longest I’ve been this irrational when it comes to a man. Seriously. This space shuttle burst into flames before even launching. I wish he would just fucking decide what it is he fucking wants. Maybe then I can set myself free. I just feel like no matter what, I keep thinking back at all the stupid potential. Honestly, “potential” is such a stupid word to even use. What the fuck is potential? So he has the potential to be a great partner in a committed relationship? But is he a great partner right now? Nah. I seriously need an intervention. Sometimes I think the only thing that will ever set me free from his “potential” is for a charming man to come along, sweep me off my feet, throw me up in the air and catch me as I gently fall without even noticing how in love we are.

I know exactly why he keeps me around. So it’s even dumber that I am still thinking about his “potential.” He keeps me around because he knows I will always respond. I will always react. I will always accept. I will always understand. I think it’s time I stop being so damn understanding. People make excuses for the way they mistreat me and I just understand. I should start taking things personally perhaps. But then again, when I make it known that I don’t accept things, I am told I have overreacted.

So I guess he really is a narcissist. He twists things around so that he can do whatever the fuck he wants while maintaining that “big heart, good intentions” charm. I’m over it.

Not really.

But I wish I was.

I really wish I could just get over it. I’ve tried. I can’t stop it. It’s so difficult. Practically impossible. How does one break the ties between two people who never gave each other a full chance? Everything is so mild. Everything besides the connection, that is. The connection itself–the energy, the love–it’s so deep, strong, attractive, intense.

I just want to fast forward to a day when I’m happily committed to someone who is happily committed to me. Simple.

 

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Somewhere in Indiana, June 2017

Focus

I know where I’m going. I know what I’m looking for. I just need to trust that my decisions will get me there. I need to trust that the steps I take, at any given moment, are leading me closer and closer to my destination. Even if I can’t see the full picture. Even if there are obstacles along the way. I will get there. And I’ll dive in fully. Without regrets.

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Jupiter, FL 03/25/18

Currently Free

Currently

Working on my throat chakra

Trying to express myself

Finding my voice

Surrounding myself with pure divine light

Elevating onto the clouds

Shifting my perspective and position

So that I can breathe

Flowing like a steady river

Free

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Tennessee River, 06/2017

Random Things That Make Me Happy

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In an effort to express more gratitude in my life.

  1. Spending time with my nephews. 👩‍👦‍👦 ❤️
  2. When my nephews start acting up and I remember I don’t have kids and can just send them right back to their parents. 😅
  3. Sending my nephews right back to their parents. 😂
  4. When I paint my own nails and they actually look decent. 💅🏼
  5. Baking from scratch. 🍰
  6. Arranging the food on my plate like a pro. 🍱
  7. When something I’ve designed and sewn actually fits properly. 👗
  8. Finding great deals while shopping on a budget. 🛍
  9. When all the traffic lights are green the entire drive home. 🚦
  10. When my car is fresh and clean, inside and out. 🚙
  11. Driving at sunset, windows down, chill music playing. 🌅
  12. Finding all the right songs that express exactly how I feel about someone. 💓
  13. Finding a new personal anthem. 🎶
  14. Working up a sweat during a workout. 🏋🏻‍♀️
  15. Feeling sore the next morning. 💪🏼
  16. When the Universe/God sends me the exact sign I asked for. 🌌
  17. Having an insightful conversation with a complete stranger. 👥
  18. Drinking tea while doing absolutely nothing else. ☕️
  19. Great phone conversations longer than an hour. 📞
  20. Finishing a great book. 📚
  21. Receiving a package much sooner than expected. 📦
  22. When I wake up with no hangover after a great night out. 🥂
  23. Traveling somewhere I’ve never been before. ✈️
  24. When my curls are poppin’ after a fresh haircut. 💇🏻
  25. Checking every item off a to-do list. 📋
  26. Learning something new about myself through astrology. ♍️
  27. When I actually get a vision during meditation. 📿
  28. Reading old journal entries and realizing how far I’ve come. 📖

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