How many times must I fly around the sun
In this dance of night and day
Watching you rise and fall alone
Before you remember where we both belong?
Continue reading “Eye of Ra”Eye of Ra
Writer’s Block
Should I have memorized
The way your hands fit in between these lines
The way your fingers touched upon every word
The way they traced every letter’s curve
Paradise
I know it looks like an oasis
But it’s actually
A full on paradise
The kind you only see in movies and in dreams
And hallucinations
No, it’s not your imagination
It’s an actual representation
Of what I have available for you
And only you
Man
Won’t you see the truth and not the mirage
You’ll love it even more
Once you see what’s in store
A puzzle completed
I started whole
Complete
One big, unaltered piece
Never lost
Always in place
Until cuts were made
Sharp and deep
Until there were many pieces
And then many more
And more
Until it was too much to keep up with
And I dropped pieces everywhere I’d go
Sometimes I would miss them
Sometimes I’d forget about them
Sometimes I’d feel incomplete
Sometimes I’d try to fill the spaces with things that didn’t fit
I tried to make the wrong pieces fit
I tried to use pieces from other puzzles
I tried to enlarge the pieces I did have
Hoping they’d fill in the empty spaces
Nothing seemed to work
Or worked only temporarily
But it’s okay
I make it work
An incomplete picture can still be art
I am still art
I decide if I’m complete
18 Questions to Ask Yourself
So every once in while, you might get the feeling that you’re stuck in a rut, monotony, a cycle of doom, or whatever else you might call it. It’s important to really check in with yourself, mentally and emotionally, so that you can figure out a way to move forward in life. If you’re finding it a bit difficult to get the ball rolling, it’s helpful to have a list of questions to ask yourself, to get to know yourself, your needs, your desires, a little better.
Here are 18 questions that I often consider whenever I’m going through one of those “I’m stuck, poor me” moods!
Questions to ask yourself
- Do I enjoy my daily activities?
- Do I like my current job?
- Do I prefer to work for a company, or do I want to run my own business?
- If I had to listen to my friends speak frankly about me, would I like what they have to say about me?
- What are my top 3 positive personality traits?
- What are my top 3 negative personality traits?
- What am I insecure about?
- Do I feel energized after spending time with the people who are around me the most? Or do I usually feel drained?
- Do I feel confident when talking to someone new about my work, career, accomplishments, etc.?
- Do I prefer to have a structured schedule, or to just go with the flow?
- Do I prefer being indoors, or being outdoors?
- Do I like working on my own? Or do I prefer to work in a team?
- Do I feel like I can express myself as freely as I’d like to?
- Is there a certain way I typically handle conflict with other people? Does it actually help, or often make things worse?
- Do I have any habits I want to quit?
- Do I feel comfortable at home?
- Do I tend to hold onto things for a long time “just in case”, or do I let go of things I have no need for?
- When I see someone doing something I’ve wanted to do, do I feel genuinely happy for them? Or do I feel jealous?
There are so many more questions I sometimes ask myself, but we’re not going to turn this post into a whole novel. Ha ha. What are some questions you consider when you’re feeling like it’s time for a change in your life? Let me know! 💖
Unsending Messages
Unsent a message
Just as soon as you sent it
But I took a screen shot of the notification
A mouthful about nothing if you had to unsend it
A whole paragraph about things you’ve been feeling
Just to take it all back
To make me think that I’m seeing things
If it isn’t there now, did it never exist?
Typing, typing
Stop.
Offline.
Well, just say what you have to say
Or don’t bother at all
What’s the difference if you’re scared and always “unsending” your feelings?
Alright, let me say something, for a change:
I’m not sitting around waiting, so if you want something, express it.
Don’t take it back shyly. It’s not cute or appealing.
I like…
Determination.
Expression.
Confidence.
Hit Send!
Okay, wait… did I really just send that?
How To Get Out of Your Head
From time to time, I go through phases where I seem to be all up in my head. There have been many times where overthinking keeps me from taking action on things that I know I will enjoy doing or even things I know I need to do. This even happens when it comes to things I know I can take care of with my eyes closed! But acknowledging this flaw helps me to overcome it by always looking for ways to get out of my head. I thought I’d share some of the things I do to get out of my head, in case anyone may be struggling with overthinking, and therefore not taking actions!
- Write down your thoughts
- Make a list of what you need to do to accomplish the task at hand
- Promise yourself a specific reward for taking action
- Start with one small step
- Keep things as simple as possible
- Talk things over with someone you trust
- Ask for help if you need it
- Remind yourself why you made this task a priority in the first place
- Imagine how it will feel when you’ve taken action
- Just do it!
My favorite one is #10: Just do it! Not to copy from the well-known athletic wear company that carries the slogan, but it’s just short, simple and to the point! Sometimes, you really need to just stop hesitating, throw caution to the wind a little, and just do it! Whatever “it” is! Done is usually better than perfect. And perfect is nearly impossible. So might as well just do it!
Your turn, as I’m always looking for tips! What are some things you do or ways you get out of your head and out of your own way?
Faith
What if I’ve been shunned, removed, exiled?
Am I still a part of the movement?
Or have I been deserted?
Do I have what it takes,
Or has all my energy been exerted?
In the light of day,
Do I appear to be sublime
But when it gets dark out,
I am less than divine?
I ask because I truly wonder
Do I dare feel confident
Or have my dreams been plundered?
If the moon should shift
And show the other side,
Should I be afraid?
Should I run and hide?
What if I don’t feel safe, secure, sheltered?
Am I still courageous?
Am I quick to fall
When it gets too heavy?
I know I need to keep going
Keep pushing through
But are you really out there?
Is it really true?
One day I dream,
One day I don’t.
One night I see,
One night I won’t.
If the sun should fade
And put away its glow,
Will it all freeze up?
Will I turn to stone?
Bedtime Tea
Just like this tea, I am in need
Of some sugar, honey, and maybe cream
So hot and spicy
This ginger tea
To ease the pain
Of my unsettled woes
To ease the strain
On my severed hopes
To soothe my throat
After all this crying
To give me life
When I feel I’m dying
Just like this tea
I can heal my pain
Forget the sadness
Ignore the rain
Take joy in each sip
From the cup that’s life
Go on with my day
Until it turns to night
Just like this tea
I am in need
To be poured into a vessel
And be held
And ease
Impromptu Break
For the past month or so, I haven’t posted anything on my blog. And I barely posted and interacted on social media in general. For some reason, I just felt… blocked. Each time I tried to post something, it just didn’t feel right. I know what you might be thinking, and trust me, I’ve thought it too: “Just do it!” Right? But I’m big on energy. The energy didn’t feel right. And so, to preserve my own energy, I decided to just take a break from the online world.
It was a much needed transition from 2020 into 2021.
Often, we act like things will automatically change when the year changes, or when the month changes, or when the season changes. And that’s not truly the case, which is why new year’s resolutions often fail. Small, gradual lifestyle changes are much more likely to stick. And these lead to greater, more profound changes that will really make a nice impact on your life. This year, instead of coming up with resolutions that I know I won’t stick to, I’ve been thinking about what I want to experience and how I want to impact people. And the little changes I can implement here and there to help me reach those goals.
A few things I will do my best to commit to are…
Consistency. This one is difficult, as a full-time employee and single mother. Getting anything else done, besides working for my regular paycheck and taking care of my little one, is a struggle more often than not. My number one priority is my son, and I don’t want to take away from quality time with him during the very important toddler years. He’s learning and growing so much everyday! Lately, we have been working on ways to keep him happily occupied while I take care of other tasks.
New Content. When I first started this blog, it was really just a place where I’d upload travel pics, random thoughts, poems, and even recipes. I ended up deciding to stick with mainly poetry and travel pics. But I would like to try expanding my blog and test out a wider range of topics. Feedback is always appreciated so please let me know what you like and what you want to see more of!
Interaction. In the past few months, I’ve come to learn that the blogging world mostly consists of bloggers encouraging, uplifting and supporting each other! I love the community energy and will do my best to engage more. 💗
Confidence. I’ve been doing self-healing work, acknowledging my shadows, and letting go of the need for perfection. Throughout my life, I’ve dealt with bouts of low self-esteem and perfectionism (a terrible combo). So I aim to just flow more freely and openly going forward. One baby step at a time though 😅
Anyway…
That’s an update on where I’ve been. Not missing in action, just working on my energy. I love you all and can’t wait to share positive vibes!
If you’ve got any tips or advice for any of my commitments, or any feedback in general, I’m all ears!
Lola M Kelly 